Food Tricks

Okay, so I was at my favorite Mexican restaurant, about to dig into this huge burrito when I stopped and said, "You know, I'd much rather have a plate of cold, wet collard greens." Well, as much as this might have thrilled my mother, it has never, and will never happen."

Despite this most obvious of revelations, I have still sat in wonderment at the fact that seed junkie birds refuse to realize what's good for them. You know-- the bad tasting stuff! (We all learned this lesson from our parents: if we like it, it's not healthy.) So, how can we get some healthy stuff down those skinny little throats of theirs? There's only one way: fool them.

One great method of deception can be borrowed from the French: sauces. The fine art of drenching something without much taste with something great. Try carrots (or something else that is healthy and crunchy) covered with some pureed grapes. Or the aforementioned collard greens with a little peanut butter.

With birds, however, you can also work it the other way around, with the sauce as the healthy stuff. Try using a little "Gerber's hollandaise," as it were. Strained yams over toast is a great way to get a bird to at least taste yams. Same with carrots or peas or squash or any baby food vegetable that you may want to get your bird to eat. Once they get the taste for it, you can more easily convert them to the vegetable in its fresh form. For a little Mediterranean flavor you may want to try the Italian method. This is anything with pasta (if you are getting them to eat the pasta), or pasta under anything (if you're trying to get them to eat the anything). The basic idea is to mix something they like with something that they may not eat by itself. Tomato sauce is another invaluable Italian bird-food invention; ours will eat almost anything in tomato sauce. (Pick the low-fat, low-sugar varieties, of course!) However, tomato is acidic, so limit this one to a couple of times a week.

My earlier allusion to the burrito was no accident. Take a whole wheat, low-fat tortilla, lay on some spinach and low/non-fat cheese (jalapeno, if you want to perpetuate the metaphor), roll it up and attach it to the side of the cage with natural, untreated leather strips. Irresistible, trust me. At the very least, it&Mac226;s a toy. At best, they eat every bite. Knowing parrots, however, it will probably be somewhere in between. With this, or any other "recipe" in this article, feel free to experiment. These are not formulas, just ideas.

If all else fails, put them on bread and water. Banana bread, that is. Take any recipe, reduce the fats and sugar and add more of the vegetable. Carrots, yams, zucchini, and bananas all work great. (Canned yams have a lot of sugar in the syrup, so you can cut out all the moisture and sugar from a standard banana bread recipe.) There is an abundance of great birdie recipes available through bird clubs, in magazines, and on the internet.

Up to this point, we were at least being honest enough with our birds to admit that we were dealing with food. Now is where we get really sneaky; making them think the food is a toy. (Not that most of them have ever thought otherwise. In fact, many also think that food is a projectile.)

The best and easiest method of doing this is to purchase a reusable food skewer. This is a stainless steel rod on which you impale the food,er, I mean the toy, screwing the bolt and of the rod into the side of a specially designed quick link, which attaches to the cage. Voila! Dangling and entertaining nutrition. Sometimes, just taking the food out of the bowl and putting it in an unusual location, with no further embellishment, will do the trick. Take those mustard greens and hang them from the top of the cage. Weave green beans in between cage bars. Tie an orange to a perch. Just try anything other than chopping it and putting it in a bowl. If it&Mac226;s fun or different (or gets in their way) they will pay some attention to it. Also look for manufactured toys that are designed to conceal and make birds work for food or treats.

Aside from the reasons stated above, this works because it is very natural for parrots to eat this way. We make it too easy for them by sticking all the food they need in a bowl right in front of them. So easy, in fact, that they may become bored. On the other hand, it is both natural, interesting, and just plain fun for them to have to work a little for their food, to have it in different forms and in different parts of the cage or other environs.

Finally, don&Mac226;t even give it to them. There is nothing that pleases my macaw more than sharing dinner with (read that: "stealing dinner from") his mom and dad. It has been said a thousand times that birds are "social eaters" and will enjoy sharing your food. But our macaw likes to eat our food so much that it is becoming down right anti-social. So if you're trying to convert your bird, just eat some fresh or steamed veggies and see if they come a runnin&Mac226;. The worst thing that can happen is that, after a few months, they don&Mac226;t show any interest, but you&Mac226;ve dropped a few pounds.

For those of us whose parents were too lenient and left us feeling uncomfortable with unfettered autonomy, here are the six basic rules of converting birds to healthier diets: PERSISTENCE, VARIETY, PERSISTENCE, VARIETY, PERSISTENCE and, of course, VARIETY. Aside from these, completely avoid caffeine, avocado, fruit pits, alcohol, chocolate, and greasy, salty, or deep-fried foods. Severely limit sugar and fat.

It is always important to remember that parrots&Mac226; dietary decisions do not rely as much on taste or smell as do ours. As a consequence, color, shape, size, consistency, temperature and texture can be very important. In other words, if raw, round carrots are refused, try steamed and chopped carrots. Keep trying new things and, eventually, they&Mac226;ll pay attention to it, even if it&Mac226;s just because they feel sorry for you.

What&Mac226;s good for you is generally good for your bird. So until birds advance psychologically such that they can truly appreciate the emotional benefits of a bag of frozen Oreos and a six-pack of beer (and, of course, learn the rules of football), they should stick to the green stuff. And just don't tell them about the Oreos.

Be creative, have fun and stick with it. Most of all, don't be afraid to be sneaky. What they don&Mac226;t know will make them feel great!